The very best baby.

Some of the best parenting advice I've received so far (and I've received A LOT) is this: You are the best parents for your child.

And that's really hard to believe, but I keep repeating it to myself, trying to let it sink in: I am the best mother for my son.

Our son.

David Atticus was born at 3:04pm on September 25th in Nairobi. He is perfect, and beautiful.

The past month has gone by in the expected blur: sleep, eat, sleep, eat. Sleep when baby sleeps. Eat when baby eats. Cry when the baby cries.

We are slowly figuring out parenthood; figuring out the balancing act, the breast feeding and diaper changing and the best burping techniques; figuring out that you never really figure it out.

Long nights with little sleep. Long days with many visitors, gifts, snacks, diapers, friends and blessings. A million pictures. A lot of dirty laundry.

Abram is doing great. I love watching him be a dad! He's been so helpful around the house, with me, with the baby, and with figuring out life-things: taking our car to the mechanic, applying for David's passport, making Visible Grace decisions, working out our budget. I'm so blessed by him, and watching him with our son is one of my favourite things about parenthood.

I (Ashby) am doing well, too. Lots of ups and downs- those postpartum hormones are no joke. There are days that I feel like I don't know anything. There are days where I feel like I know what I'm doing, but it doesn't matter, because I'm so tired. There are days where I feel like parenthood is exactly what I expected. And there are days when I feel like I'm on top of things- caught up on laundry, emails and dishes- but this lasts for only a few hours before I'm back to panicked/tired/overwhelmed. You with me? I know I'm not alone here.

My (Ashby's) mom was able to travel to Kenya for the first half of October. We loved having her here! In addition to getting time with her grandson, and helping us with dishes and diapers (thanks mom!), she was able to meet our friends here, and, most importantly, to visit Visible Grace and meet the kids! Glen has been supportive of Ashby and Visible Grace since day one, and it was really wonderful for her to get this opportunity. Allowing Glen to meet the VG kids was a major factor in our decision to have the baby in Nairobi. (I never did get around to my 'where are you having the baby?' blog entry, did I?)

We will be here in Nairobi for a few more days, before heading back to Tanzania. At the moment we are waiting for David's passport --Canadian, by the way-- and then we're out of here! We are so glad we made the decision to have the baby here. The hospital where we delivered was amazing, and we felt that the staff was equipped for anything that might have gone wrong (which, thankfully, didn't.) We were also blessed to have the support of our many friends and 'family' here in Kenya.

AIM ladies threw Ashby a baby shower! 

We will be in Tanzania only a few short weeks-- then we are headed to Canada and Oregon! Again for only a few short weeks. We hope to settle at home in Tanzania at the beginning of the year.

What a year it's been! We are so grateful for you, our internet village. From late night pep talks via Facebook, to hand-me-down clothes and blankets that my mom brought over, to donations that made it possible to buy a car- we are ever mindful that we have such an amazing group of people in our lives. Thank you.

How to be completely exhausted in just 39 simple steps.

Step one: be 34 weeks pregnant.

Step two: travel over 2000 kilometers, divided into three, 12 hour days.

Step three: It’s so hot.

Step four…

Abram and I finally, finally got the paperwork for our car at the end of August. By this time we were significantly late for several appointments and meetings, but we were still hoping to get to Nairobi in time to meet with my OB, who will be delivering the baby in October. (We are planning to have the baby in Nairobi- more on that later.) Oh- and then to get back to our village by the beginning of September, so Abram could teach a class. Confused? Me too. 

Dar to Mwanza to Nairobi. Our village of Bulima is just outside of Mwanza (on the left side of the screen/route.)

So, at 5am on Friday, August 22, we loaded up our new car and hit the road. 5am proved to be a pretty good time to leave Dar es Salaam, and we made pretty good time, until we hit a diversion, or “dirvision” as it was spelled on the hand-written sign. Even with a several-hour-detour on bumpy, dirt roads, the trip overall was not bad, and we were in mid-Tanzania by 5pm. There are some beautiful parts of Africa to drive through, but this particular view was not my favourite.

Our view for several hours on Friday. 

Driving in Africa is very different from driving in North America. I am not sure how to describe it to you. For one thing, one could easily cover 2000 kilometers in a single day, in the US- I’ve done it myself, driving from Portland to San Diego for college. But here, there are speed bumps, bumpy roads, lots of "bathroom" stops (seriously, third trimester, people), police checks, dirvisions and any other number of things that can pop up and slow you down. We were very fortunate that our overall trip went so smoothly- we didn’t even have to add ‘car breakdowns’ or ‘flat tires’ to the list! 

One of our bathroom stops. 

When we got to the town of Singida, (located in the middle of nowhere, Tanzania), we found a lovely hotel on a small lake. It looked rather isolated, and after 4 months of noisy noisy city sounds, we were looking forward to a good – peaceful!- night’s rest. 

We saw a bar on the premises, and remembered that it was a Friday, so one of the things Abram asked about upon checkin, at my request, was if there would be music and noise at night. ‘None at all’, was the reply from our kind and friendly hostess. 

So I honestly thought it was a practical joke when, not 20 minutes later, I heard a MARCHING BAND enter the parking lot. I got video, because otherwise I would later convince myself I was exaggerating or imagining things…and then I accidentally deleted it! You people are missing out. Really. 

Thankfully, they were just escorting a wedding party into the hotel, and after taking pictures and serenading us for a few minutes, the band left. 

Abram and I went for a brief walk to stretch our legs, had dinner (which took two hours!) and went to bed. (I did wake up at 1am to a pounding bass from the music coming from the bar. Oh well…)

We decided to sleep in on Saturday, and didn’t leave until around 8. This day was much shorter, and much smoother- almost the entire thing on paved roads! We reached the city of Mwanza by 2pm, and Abram dropped me off at a restaurant, where I happily sat and drank coffee and read my book while he ran car-related errands in town. 

Mwanza- second largest city in TZ, and the fastest-growing city in East Africa. 

Mwanza is the nearest city to our home in the village of Bulima. When in Bulima (which admittedly hasn’t been much of the year thus far), we come to Mwanza about once a week, to do grocery shopping, go to the bank/use the ATM, visit my (other) OB for checkups, etc. On this road trip, we ran a few errands, ate lunch, and picked up our friends Steve and Judy- the house parents at Visible Grace- and their baby John. Judy and John had been in Mwanza since John was born, and Steve had come down to escort them to Nairobi to settle in at VG. 

We left Mwanza around 5:30 and finally got home- like, to our house- at 7pm on Saturday. This gave me a luxurious 12 hours in my own home, to sorta-unpack, prepare some snacks, and prepare for the next leg of our trip: to Nairobi!

Bright and early on Sunday morning, Steve, Judy, baby John, another friend named Feleshi, Abram and I piled in our car and headed north. (It should be noted that rides around the continent are not to be wasted- riding in a crowded car with friends is always preferable over riding the bus!) The drive to Nairobi isn’t bad- about 600 kilometers. We weren’t sure what to expect at the border, but it only took Abram about an hour to register the car and pay the taxes and fees. We had to verify that we did not have a temperature, had not buried anyone recently, did not have blood coming out of our mouths, and did not have any friends in West Africa, before we could enter Kenya…yeah, Ebola is no joke, you guys.  (Thankfully there have been no outbreaks in TZ or Kenya.)

Because Abram and I do not eat any grains/wheat, and because I’m pregnant and eat every hour or so, I had packed a LOT of snacks for our trip. I was a bit worried about being hungry, but between the cold chicken, hard boiled eggs, apples and peanut butter, dried pineapple, grapes, paleo muffins, and coconut macaroons, we actually had more than enough to eat and didn’t even stop for lunch. 

Though the scenery was a bit more lively, we found the journey on the Kenya side to be muuuuch slower. Kenya is more developed than Tanzania, and probably has more paved roads overall. But the main road we followed was paved a very long time ago. It is narrow and windy, and there are just more people on the road- bicycles, motorcycles, trucks, personal vehicles, busses and pedestrians. And goats. And cows. And baboons. This makes it harder to pass anyone, should you get stuck behind, say, a truck over-loaded with haybales, which is traveling at approximately 20 kph. 

Nonetheless, we made it to Nairobi by 6pm. We were thrilled to get into town ahead of traffic (mostly), and before it got dark. We took Steve and Judy home, went to dinner, bought groceries for the next morning, went to the flat we are renting, and collapsed into bed.

This may sound anti-climactic, but that’s probably because I’ve been here too long to notice or remember any sort of Africa-isms that took place- the things people want to hear about, that make road trips here so different. It’s also because the trip went much more smoothly than I expected- other than needing to stop every couple hours to use a restroom, and to stretch, and needing a pillow for my back, I really did well and surprised myself by how normal I was feeling by the end of the third day!

So- cross ‘ridiculous cross-continent African safari in your third trimester’ off my bucket list. 

FAQ2: What do you do all day?

Another frequently asked question about our lives here:

What do you do every day? What's a typical day like for you guys? 

(Last year, I was running around doing a little of everything, and Abram was writing, writing, writing. Our lives are very different now!)

For one thing, we just finished 12  13  14 weeks of language school! For the past three months, we had Swahili classes every weekday morning. I'm not going to lie to you, friends: it was super hard. I woke up some mornings dreading it. My friends all assured me that they struggled with it, too- and they weren't even pregnant, exhausted, sweltering in the heat, etc. There were mornings I cried over passive tense. Our teacher was great! But it was just really, really hard. (Side note: yes, I did learn some Swahili in Kenya. But Tanzanians speak 100% Swahili, and their grammar is very different, so the Swahili I know could only get me so far. Abram, who is fairly fluent, is learning to translate.)

After class each day, I make lunch, then take a nap, wake up and do emails/work on the computer, and start dinner. After dinner, we have an exciting rotation of playing scrabble, reading to each other (we just finished Brothers Karamazov!) and watching TV on Abram's computer. The days fill up, somehow. Abram usually spends the afternoon working on his dissertation. He won't start teaching until next month.

My personal theme for this year has been food. Between Abram's paleo preferences, a limited variety of food in the village, and my pregnancy (nausea, and then insane appetite) and dietary restrictions, life this year has revolved around acquiring food. Oh- and last year I sure didn't have time to bake and enjoy gourmet, from-scratch meals, so I'm really, really enjoying it now! (I know, I know- it won't last. I know. I know how babies work. Thank you.) 

I've basically mastered the art of paleo baking (she said, while brushing peanut-butter-and-honey cookie crumbs off the keyboard). I'm getting the hang of cooking meat (I was a vegetarian for 10 years!). And I'm getting good at throwing together themed meals without a recipe. I do miss some things, but I love the food we eat now, too.  What I don't love: everything- even snacks- is from scratch, and it's a lot of work. (You can only eat so many apples in a day, you know? And even then, you need a knife and a plate.) What I also don't love: we don't have a dishwasher. Anyway. Enough about food!

Abram wants me to add that one of our hobbies is riding public transportation. We are currently waiting for paperwork to come through on the purchase of our car (yay! thanks for your support, everyone!) and then we will head to Nairobi for a few days, where we will have a board meeting, visit the kids (pics coming soon!), and meet the doctor who will deliver our baby. Then we will head back down to Bulima, (roughly the 25th of August) where Abram will teach a block course (on hermeneutics, for the record), before we head back to Nairobi to have the baby (arriving in Nairobi approximately Sept 15). Confused yet? So are we.

If baby comes on time, we will be back in Bulima by mid-October. Then our schedules will be slightly different. :)

So…wait. That's your whole day? Swahili and napping and cooking?

No, silly. We also go for walks every evening. 

He's so etsy right now. 

(Super moon, not super photo. I don't have my tripod here.) 

Frequently Asked Questions

I get the same exact four questions, over and over, so I'm going to spend the next few (…four, to be exact) posts answering them!

Number one, and most frequent:

What about Visible Grace/what's your job now/how does it work/what do you do?

I'm so grateful to my friends who have stood by my side over the last decade, supporting both me personally, and Visible Grace. I would never have been able to get VG on its feet, and I would never have survived (mentally, emotionally, physically- it's a tough job!) without good people on my side. I also want to say thank you for the unbelievably kind responses we got to our last post. To be honest it was a little scary and hard to write, but I felt nothing but support and understanding and love from you, my dear reader-friends. 

Last year when we were making some tough decisions, Abram and I both consulted family and older, wiser friends (including the Visible Grace board) before committing to anything. During that time, we- me, Abram, the board, some good friends, family- all reached the same conclusion, and this might totally blow you away:

I am sort of not great at admin. Or at being a director.

And I hated to admit it, because, well. Because I was doing it, and I wanted to be good at it, and, oh yeah- I want to be good at everything.

But I was secretly relieved to not be in charge of VG anymore. 

Right now, we have an incredible team up in Kenya, and each of them is doing better at their job than I ever did. (It helps that each of them is only doing one job, instead of four.) And this frees me up to…well…be me. To do the things I love.

To take pictures.

And laugh a lot.

And tell stories.
And dream about who these kids will become someday. 

And spend time with my husband (what? working 20 hours a day, seven days a week isn't conducive to a healthy marriage?!).

And - most importantly- to focus on our growth, our goals, and the relationships that really matter within VG.

So, at the moment, the house parents and Kenyan manager get to make the tough decisions. The hiring and firing, the discipline and budget problems. And the details I'm not great at- budgeting, spreadsheets, accounts. Abram and I sit on the Kenyan board, which means we go up for meetings 3-4 times a year, and we spend a lot of time emailing and calling the staff and board. We also serve as the sort of ambassadors to the American board- joining via conference call for many of their meetings, emailing with advice about vision and development, as well as serving as a sort of cultural translator, between the African staff and the American board members. 

My personal job, at the moment, is "sponsorship coordinator". This means I am responsible for finding and maintaining sponsors for all of our kids. Sending kids' artwork to the sponsors, updating them via Facebook, updating the VG blog (don't look at it right now. I'm going to update it after we go to Nairobi next week), emailing them about the kids…ahem. 

To be honest, I haven't done a great job this year- not because I've been in Tanzania, but because being in Tanzania, being pregnant, and being newly married has (almost) kicked my butt, and then on the days I had more time and energy- bam, the power and internet would go out. But, I'm getting better at it, and upping my game. Really. I am! Really!

I'm kinda-sorta the social media person as well, which means writing newsletters, updating our Facebook page, promoting the upcoming auction (November 8!), and running our Instagram feed. When I'm not in Kenya, the house father, Steve, sends me pictures of the kids.

When we go to Kenya next week to visit the kids and board (and my doctor)? Well. You can expect roughly seventy-five thousand new pictures. 

From Abram- our latest prayer letter.

Dear Friends,

            Praise the Lord.

In this letter, we would like to share some news from a couple of Abram’s former students at NTC (Nassa Theological College- the school where Abram has been teaching).  We believe that Abram’s ministry of educating and equipping Tanzanian pastors is very important, and we are encouraged to see how God is expanding His kingdom through some of these students.

            Samuel is one of a few pioneer Tanzanian missionaries working among Muslims.  He and his family planted several churches along the coastal region before moving and resettling in Dar es Salaam.  He has started another church here in Dar and remains a keen evangelist reaching Muslims.  One of the creative ministry methods he uses is a farming program that teaches the gospel as well as sustainable farming practices.

            Another enthusiastic former student is Yohana.  He has been training Christians to teach the religious period in public high schools and to minister to students.  The opportunities to reach young people are amazing, as teaching the Bible as a school subject is welcomed.  Yohana has also recently decided to dedicate more time to working with unreached peoples.  He recently started working in an unreached area and already has a church of 29 believers.  Both he and Samuel are actively advocating among churches for more indigenous mission work.

            Stories like these are very encouraging to us.  We believe the best way for Tanzanians to hear the gospel is from fellow Tanzanians.  We are excited to see God working in these NTC students and affirming this valuable ministry.

            In other news, thank you so much for your prayers and financial support towards purchasing a vehicle.  We now have enough money to buy a good car for our family and ministry.  Please pray that we get paperwork and payment sorted out so that we may leave Dar es Salaam (with our car) in the next couple weeks.

            Personally, we are doing pretty well.  We are making progress with Swahili learning and have been blessed by new friendships among some of the AIM families working in this part of the country.  We have visited a few AIC churches here in Dar, and Abram was invited to preach from Mark chapter four.

We have had several doctor appointments and are relieved that our son seems to be healthy and growing well. Ashby’s pregnancy has been going fairly well, though as she progresses into the third trimester she is growing more tired and uncomfortable.

In the past two months we welcomed a new nephew on each side of our family.  We love receiving pictures and updates from them and can’t wait to someday meet them.  Our Tanzanian brother Steve and his wife Judy (house parents at the Visible Grace children’s home) also gave birth to a baby boy in early July. Unfortunately, baby John was born with pneumonia and weak lungs and spent the first few weeks of his life in NICU.  He is now at home and doing better.  Please keep this sweet family in your prayers.

Thank you all for your faithful support of our ministry here.  Please continue to lift us up in prayer as the next few months hold many transitions.

           

From your brother and sister in Christ,

Abram and Ashby 

catching up, part 2: you want to live where?

So you guys know I love Abram, right?

He's pretty dreamy. He treats me really well. Also he makes good smoothies. Also, this:

See? You'd fall in love with him too. But you can't; he's taken. 

I guess my point is that it wasn't very hard to fall in love with him. We were both in Nairobi, we both love Jesus and Africa and kids and books and avocados. We had so much fun together no matter what we were doing. He was there for me when I really needed him. He makes wise decisions and treats people well. Everyone thinks highly of him. It was so perfect: We fell in love and dated and got engaged in Kenya. We were living out my dream life: meet a Christian guy who's already in Africa.

In Nairobi.

But there was one teeny tiny catch and, I'll admit, when I first met Abram I was basically in complete denial of this: Abram is a doctoral student, and his research topic for his dissertation is based in…

Tanzania. (Where?)

He's committed to living in Tanzania for the next 2+ years, serving with AIM and researching and interviewing and writing his dissertation. And this is a problem for me, because I…I love Kenya.

I mean everyone knows that.

And most people know my story: for ten years, I have been working on starting a home for orphaned children in Nairobi, Kenya. I spent the majority of my time in Oregon, fundraising and networking, and traveling to Kenya once or twice a year. In 2012, the board of my non profit decided it was time to send me to Kenya full time to the home (finally!) up and running.

This was an answer to prayer. For a decade, I have felt that my heart was in Kenya, and wanted to be there, to get Visible Grace going, to work with kids who needed to be loved. It was finally time! Sort of.

When I met Abram I knew God was blessing me even beyond what I'd asked for. I got to move to Kenya! We opened the home and started taking in kids! And then I met Mr Perfect. I really had it all.

Except I didn't.

Abram and I started talking about marriage really quickly. During our whirlwind of romance and life (running a children's home and finishing a doctorate program- no big deal, guys) we talked a lot about our future. We have similar passions and visions- I desire to educate children, so they grow up well, and he loves educating and equipping African adults, so that they can in turn equip others. We have different fields, but we really desire the same thing.

Abram spent about 10 of the last 14 years teaching at a Bible college in Tanzania, and this is where he chose his research topic for his dissertation. (Two years ago he decided to go back to school himself, to get a Ph.D. He just so happened to choose a college in Nairobi…) While he finishes his dissertation, he's also teaching at the Bible college here. In Tanzania.

In not Kenya.

Like I said, we spent a lot of time talking about our future. We felt like we had a few choices. Except I really didn't feel like I had a choice at all:

~Not marry Abram
~Stay in Kenya and make him abandon his studies
~Marry Abram and follow him to Tanzania

This was a really difficult decision for both of us. I didn't feel ready to let go of my dream job; Abram didn't want to see me hurt and grieving. It was also hard because I felt like the Lord had only just allowed me to move to Kenya and see get Visible Grace up and running. I had been waiting so long to see it become a reality. Was He really taking it away from me so quickly? Or testing me to see if I cared about the love of a man more than obedience to God? (Yes, I really wondered that.)

Here's the thing, though: Visible Grace was up and running. We were seeing it become a reality.

So the choice wasn't necessarily taking away from the ministry. In fact, at the moment VG is thriving- without me! Abram and I are part of the board and are in touch often. We have a Kenyan manager, which I think is important. We plan to go up several times a year- it's a day's drive from where we live. I miss the kids, but really, everyone is thriving right now. It's possible this is exactly what was needed in order to take this thing to the next level- to help it move beyond me.

But it was so hard, you guys. Excruciating. At first I felt like I was being asked to choose between my first born child and the love of my life. (Seriously- I raised VG from its infancy and worked on it 24/7 and it kept me up at night and consumed all my resources and time and was my baby. Tell me that's not like a baby.)

Throughout the entire process I could feel God's hand at work, and I knew that, for whatever reason, this was what God wanted me to do. To step back from VG, to leave the city and country I love, and to follow Abram to Tanzania. I'm still figuring out why, and what that looks like, but I am confident He's leading me in the right direction. (Tanzania, by the way, is fairly similar to Kenya. Not a huge change.)

Another step in this decision was to join Africa Inland Mission, because Abram is a missionary through them, and we want to be on the same team. This step wasn't really as big a deal. AIM is a great organisation full of great people. It also provides me with stability I haven't had before, like…infrastructure. And health insurance. This move also took me off Visible Grace's payroll, which is fantastic for VG financially, and enables us to save up a bit, for exciting things like…a new sceptic tank. I know, I know- why don't I blog about that?!

So. There's my 'confession'. I have been toying with this post for months, because a lot of clarification was needed, and a lot of people don't really know where I live or what I'm up to. (Some people think we live at the children's home, and for the record, that was never part of the plan. I think the kids deserve African parents, and I think we deserve some privacy in our first year of marriage.)

I'm still not thrilled about being here, some days. But that's okay. Because this is home for now, with Abram, and we'll figure it out together. We don't know what our next step will be, or what God has in store for us. But for now, we're here.

the catch-up post: 2013

I keep putting off blogging because I know I'll have to start at practically the beginning. The beginning for me and Abram was only about 18 months ago, but we've fit an awful lot into that time, so it's still a lot to write about!

Among other things, in 2013:

~We were both living in Kenya

~We got engaged in February

~I (Ashby) moved from the home I was renting in Ngong (near Abram) to the children's home (Visible Grace). This put me over an hour away from Abram, but…

~We opened the children's home and took in our first kids! Something almost ten years in the making!

~We had to fire our manager, who also happened to be my best friend and former housemate. This ended our friendship, shattered me emotionally, cut me off from much of my community in Nairobi, and resulted in my working two jobs--

~I was serving as director, house mother, and manager for Visible Grace (I was spread too thin and felt like I was doing all jobs poorly)

~By June we had 6  kids and by August, 8 kids! Such a blessing; so much work!

~In June we also hosted one of our good friends for 12 weeks. Scott stayed with Abram and interned with VG: he did everything from writing up kids' bios and staff handbooks, to cleaning the bathroom, to playing with the kids in the yard, to teaching our staff CPR, to helping me with wedding invites…seriously, Scott was a lifesaver. This was especially helpful because…

~I was also hosting various parasites, including malaria and schistosomiasis (look it up if you dare). I was really, really sick. Oh, and I came down with 'atypical pneumonia'.

~Abram also had his hands full, because in addition to caring for me (physically and mentally- I was a wreck), he defended his dissertation proposal (good job, honey!) and finished his final papers for his PHD program. This means he is done with classes and is now working on his dissertation. He also hosted a weekly small group at his school and joined the VG board. Did I mention the papers? He wrote several hundred thousand words last spring. Doctorate level. That man works hard.

~In June we made the decision that I would join Africa Inland Mission, the organization Abram serves with. This resulted in a mountain of paperwork and hours of psychological tests. (An amusing aside: When I finally got admitted to AIM, they told me they had reservations because of some of my answers on the testing. Are you more tired than normal? Are you stressed? Do you feel like you are over-burdened? When I explained the extenuating circumstances they agreed that I handled it well enough and that it was an exceptional situation…and wanted to be sure I wouldn't do it again. Ha. I don't think I'll get pneumonia, lose my best friend, and adopt eight kids again any time soon!)

~In July Abram and I began several hours of pre-marital counselling

~Visible Grace hired a part time manager to help me with a lot of the daily operations (she quit in February 2014)

~In August we hosted three more good friends, who came for two weeks to help out with the kids and help us host our housewarming party! And helped me pack! And built us a chicken house!

~On August 3rd, 2013 we threw a housewarming party for the children's home. I believe there were over a hundred people there. To be perfectly honest, Abram, Scott and our new manager did most of the work. But I showed up…

~I also managed to pack and be ready to go back to the States, first to Georgia for a five-day orientation to AIM, then to Oregon for three weeks…

~Oh, and we planned a wedding.

WHEW. I need a break just re-reading this.

Last summer were some of the sweetest memories I'll ever have- I have always, always wanted to be a mama to orphaned children, and these specific children were part of a vision I've had for a decade. I was so unbelievably blessed to live there and work with those kids. At the same time, I don't want to do that ever again- I was so stressed, so sad and emotional, so exhausted and so sick.

I really do thank God for Abram at this time. God also put some lovely Kenyan and American women in my life just when I badly needed friends and was missing my best friend. In 2013, I learned a lot…and cried a lot.

So this basically leads us up to September of 2013. Still with me? I'll post about life after wedding, later this week.