the catch-up post: 2013

I keep putting off blogging because I know I'll have to start at practically the beginning. The beginning for me and Abram was only about 18 months ago, but we've fit an awful lot into that time, so it's still a lot to write about!

Among other things, in 2013:

~We were both living in Kenya

~We got engaged in February

~I (Ashby) moved from the home I was renting in Ngong (near Abram) to the children's home (Visible Grace). This put me over an hour away from Abram, but…

~We opened the children's home and took in our first kids! Something almost ten years in the making!

~We had to fire our manager, who also happened to be my best friend and former housemate. This ended our friendship, shattered me emotionally, cut me off from much of my community in Nairobi, and resulted in my working two jobs--

~I was serving as director, house mother, and manager for Visible Grace (I was spread too thin and felt like I was doing all jobs poorly)

~By June we had 6  kids and by August, 8 kids! Such a blessing; so much work!

~In June we also hosted one of our good friends for 12 weeks. Scott stayed with Abram and interned with VG: he did everything from writing up kids' bios and staff handbooks, to cleaning the bathroom, to playing with the kids in the yard, to teaching our staff CPR, to helping me with wedding invites…seriously, Scott was a lifesaver. This was especially helpful because…

~I was also hosting various parasites, including malaria and schistosomiasis (look it up if you dare). I was really, really sick. Oh, and I came down with 'atypical pneumonia'.

~Abram also had his hands full, because in addition to caring for me (physically and mentally- I was a wreck), he defended his dissertation proposal (good job, honey!) and finished his final papers for his PHD program. This means he is done with classes and is now working on his dissertation. He also hosted a weekly small group at his school and joined the VG board. Did I mention the papers? He wrote several hundred thousand words last spring. Doctorate level. That man works hard.

~In June we made the decision that I would join Africa Inland Mission, the organization Abram serves with. This resulted in a mountain of paperwork and hours of psychological tests. (An amusing aside: When I finally got admitted to AIM, they told me they had reservations because of some of my answers on the testing. Are you more tired than normal? Are you stressed? Do you feel like you are over-burdened? When I explained the extenuating circumstances they agreed that I handled it well enough and that it was an exceptional situation…and wanted to be sure I wouldn't do it again. Ha. I don't think I'll get pneumonia, lose my best friend, and adopt eight kids again any time soon!)

~In July Abram and I began several hours of pre-marital counselling

~Visible Grace hired a part time manager to help me with a lot of the daily operations (she quit in February 2014)

~In August we hosted three more good friends, who came for two weeks to help out with the kids and help us host our housewarming party! And helped me pack! And built us a chicken house!

~On August 3rd, 2013 we threw a housewarming party for the children's home. I believe there were over a hundred people there. To be perfectly honest, Abram, Scott and our new manager did most of the work. But I showed up…

~I also managed to pack and be ready to go back to the States, first to Georgia for a five-day orientation to AIM, then to Oregon for three weeks…

~Oh, and we planned a wedding.

WHEW. I need a break just re-reading this.

Last summer were some of the sweetest memories I'll ever have- I have always, always wanted to be a mama to orphaned children, and these specific children were part of a vision I've had for a decade. I was so unbelievably blessed to live there and work with those kids. At the same time, I don't want to do that ever again- I was so stressed, so sad and emotional, so exhausted and so sick.

I really do thank God for Abram at this time. God also put some lovely Kenyan and American women in my life just when I badly needed friends and was missing my best friend. In 2013, I learned a lot…and cried a lot.

So this basically leads us up to September of 2013. Still with me? I'll post about life after wedding, later this week.